Friday, September 19, 2008

The aroma is a mixed bouquet...including sour milk vomit, grape flavored zyrtec, fresh coffee and a hint of burnt scrambled eggs

Jade has not been feeling well. In the middle of the night, Jerry went to her aide with Tylenol for a sudden fever. When it was all said and done he ended up letting her cry herself back to sleep, which thankfully didn't take very long.

This morning when I opened her door, with bottle in hand, I was taken over with the smell of baby vomit. And then I caught sight of her. It was obviously not fresh. It was not only caked on her bedding, but on her face and hair as well. Remnants of a barely distinguishable black bean and a carrot were matted into her blond curls. I guess she had thrown up as she cried herself to sleep. Poor thing...I'm trying no the let the mommy guilt set in.

My first instinct was to put her straight in the bath. But she had already seen the bottle, so she one the argument. 7 ounces later, I thought she felt warm, so we took a quick detour down to the kitchen for some Tylenol.

When the coughing started, I knew it wasn't a good sign. The vomiting began. How does milk curdle so quickly? I was just thankful it was on the tile floor since it had a tinge of red Tylenol to it.

In case you are wondering what sort of volume her projectile produced, Lily put it into words quite nicely. "Wow, Mom, Jade threw up all over. There is no space to walk in the kitchen now."

Not only that, but Jade and I were both covered too. I decided to head up to the bath and in very few words made sure that Lily knew to stay out of the kitchen.

We stripped down and I quickly got myself washed and redressed. Then I went to work on getting the dried food out of her hair. Two shampoos and several combings later, she was clean and smelled like a Gerber baby.

Now the bed. I scraped up as much as I could and rolled up the sheets and blankets and tossed them on the bathroom floor in the pile with our vomit laden clothes.

After a quick call to my mom, I was reminded not to feed her anything else. She doesn't quite realize the force that Jade is to be reckoned with when it comes to eating. After all, the high chair is her happy place. And that is just where she went so I could start to work on the kitchen floor.

I did a hands and knees job on the floor because I can't stand the thought of vomit being on my mop head.

Clean baby, clean momma, clean floor and isolated vomit laundry. The day was looking brighter.

I started the coffee and threw some eggs in the skillet. I decided to attempt the Tylenol again and lay Jade down for her morning nap.

Somehow, while making some toast for Lily, my elbow brushed the Zyrtec bottle and it went crashing to the floor. Ugh. The aroma of vomit was still hinted in the air...and now the smell of sweet grape Zyrtec? Yuck. Along with the eggs and was just too much.

Thankfully at least I was able to use my mop after wiping up the sticky syrup and glass pieces.

But, what's that I hear? Jade. Crying. The smash of the glass on the floor must have woken her up. And I dare not let her cry it out and start this whole process of vomit removal over again.

So I go up to try to get her back to sleep. Mission accomplished.

I head back down the stairs and a new fragrance greets my nose. The eggs. THE EGGS! I forgot about the eggs. Burnt eggs now.

And what do I find on my kitchen floor this time?

In the few minutes I was up calming Jade, Lily decided to take a "craft" upon herself. It involved rolling out an entire roll of aluminum foil and emptying a new box of gallon size ziplocs. And of course...glue.

I glanced up at the clock hoping for it to reveal 7PM bedtime, but it stared back at me with a rude 9:49 AM.

So I cleaned up Lily's "craft", cancelled our morning playdate, opened up the windows, and thanked the Lord for seasonal allergies.

I can't imagine smelling all of this at 100% nasal capacity.


My2Gs said...

You poor thing. I hate when Gauge is sick like that. Bless their hearts they can't tell you how they're feeling. Poor Gauge lives on Pedylite when he's puking. He's kind of like Jade is with his food. I hope your little girl is good as new soon!
~ Lacie

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

Milk barf is the wost!

Hope it doesn't last long, hang in there :)

Jackie @ Our Moments Our Memories said...

Oh, sweetie...that is AWFUL. I felt a little queasy just reading your title...I don't do great with descriptions like that. Yikes. You are a better woman than I am, apparently...I would have chucked the sheets in the trash. I cannot handle it. I hope your weekend is better!

Colored With Memories said...

Updated Vomit Count: 3

Updated Snuggles w/Mama Count: 57

Rachelle said...

WOW...This is the kind of post that allows me to be OK with being a working outside of the house kid free woman....Where was this post a few days ago when I was cursing the China wait?????

Sounds like you could use a VACA...I think PA is calling....Can you hear it??? Kerry....KERRRRRYYYYY.....=)

Hope Jade is better soon...=)

Colored With Memories said...

Updated Vomit Count: 4

Updated Snuggles w/Mama Count: 103

Colored With Memories said...

Updated Vomit Count: 5

Updated Snuggles w/Mama Count: N/A

No time to snuggle...she awoke w/104.1 and vomitted again...not keeping liquids down. Jerry is taking her to urgent care right now. Poor thing...say a prayer!

Tricia Hoffmann said...

I hate to say it, but with all that exposure to the "puke", you are next. Trinity was 100 yards from home and yacked up grapes and curdled milk in the car. I got sick 24 hours later from cleaning it up. Vinegar helps with the smell. Hope she is alright tonight.

jennifer@love,laughter,and lyrics said...

Oh, Girl.

Been there. I could have written this one.

Melissa Stephens said...

Oh, no! Hope to hear better news soon.

Marci @Finding Joy in the Journey said...

Wow, sounds like it's been a long day in your house! I sure hope Jade feels better soon! I'm sending prayers your way for everyone else in your house to be granted immunity for this one!

ps thank you for the blog award! It was my first!

Life In Progress said...

Oh, now that is one descriptive title! WOW. I'm so sorry your baby is sick - keep us updated.

BoufMom9 said...

OH MY! As soon as I read the title, I was feeling bad for you.
UGH! That is just horrible! Poor you & poor kiddies.

life with the wisners said...

poor punkin'. as funny as your post was, please update us with information on how she is. bless her heart. and yours.

love to you guys.

Carolina Mama said...

Oh now, I was afraid to see the number climb. Did it stop at 5. Poor thing. Hope everyone is on the mend.

Suzie said...

I think we had the same night. I hope your baby feels better soon.

Jamie @ Purposeful Pursuit said...

Oh, I'm so sorry! I hope she is feeling better by now.

Sarah Markley said...

i am so sorry! yes, kiddos snuggle more when sick - gotta love that! =) hope you all feel better soon.

Irritable Mother said...

Oh my goodness. Would it be really terrible for me to admit I am laughing right now?
Not at you, mind you. Laughing at your situation. When things keep piling up like that around me, the only thing I can do is laugh. (OK, sometimes the tears come faster than the laughter!)
I sure hope Jade is feeling better by now!

Wendi @ Every Day Miracles said...

Oh how my heart goes out to you! That is the worst! I'm so sorry! I hope that fever goes down. :(

Amanda said...

ugh! praise the lord for season allergies is RIGHT! :)

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