From the mouths of Lily and Jade

I have to record a few mistakes in Jade's speech that continually make us chuckle. Soon she will heed our corrections and inevitably we will forget she ever did it.

body
I am sitting on my body.
Ooh. I can see your body.
I better get my panties on so you can't see my body.
body=bottom

cinderella
Mom, why are you bringing your cinderella?
We're going to need a cinderella today!
Where is my Pooh cinderella?
cinderella=umbrella

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Lily got so frustrated with me the other day in the van. She began telling me that she really wanted to watch "Hazel".
Me-Hazel?
Lily-Yes, Hazel!
Me-(completely stumped) Like your hazel eyes?
Lily-No! The girl who has the long hair!
Me-(relieved) Oh...you mean Rapunzel! Okay, well I'll look for that video.
Lily-So mom, do you think it would hurt to have a prince climb up your hair?
Me-Hmm. Not sure that I really want to find out my dear!

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To find out how other kiddos are making their parents chuckle, head over to:

Uno, Dos, Tres

There has been some language confusion in our home.

Until last week, it wasn't something I gave much thought to...other than giving a gentle correction from time to time. Now I'm seeing raised eyebrows and fearing being accused of cultural insensitivity.

Lily must be learning how to count in Spanish at preschool. Now she is aware of language and the fact that there is more than just our own.

The problem is that she for the longest time kept thinking that we spoke Spanish and everyone else spoke English. Somehow in trying to correct that, all was lost.

Now any other language that is foreign to her is simply called "uno, dos, tres".

The other evening we went for dinner at a Japanese hibachi place and later followed it with a trip to the Dollar Tree...extremes, I know.

Our table chef was really good at interacting with Lily, but between the noise of the restaurant and his thick accent, she could not understand him. During one interaction she was left puzzled and unsure of what he had said. And then in the most accusatory manner, she asks him, "Are you speaking in Uno, Dos, Tres?" Thankfully he didn't hear her and no knives were accidentally tossed in our direction.

Later at the Dollar Tree, there was another language incident. There was a family behind us in line that was speaking neither Spanish nor Japanese. I didn't realize that Lily was listening intently to their conversation. When out of the blue I hear, "I CAN'T understand a word you are saying! Are you speaking UNO, DOS, TRES?!?", again in an accusatory manner.

Oh my. Thankfully, Jerry whisked her away quickly and our minivan became a cultural sensitivity classroom for the ride home.

She is one that speaks her mind...and my mom is always quick to remind me that I did the same thing at her age (and still do!), so I'm sure many more embarrassing payback moments are in store for me. At least I've already got the bald man situation under my belt.

If you want to read about other things kids have been saying this week, head over to Tiny Talk Tuesday at Not Before 7.

My "Stripes"

We are in the part of Texas that has had some sort of storm sitting over it for days. It has been raining nonstop since last Thursday and there is no end in sight.

All of this rain has brought on some umbrella usage drama in our household. It seems the girls want to have their umbrellas open in the car, in the house, in the store...wherever they are...raining or not.

So today after I instituted some rules about not opening the umbrellas anywhere other than OUTSIDE, Lily immediately tested me. She popped her umbrella open in our crowded entryway and nearly poked her sister in the eye.

I took her upstairs to counsel her...mainly over the disobedience. I told her that I wasn't trying to be mean, but that I was trying to keep someone from getting their eyes poked. I went on to tell her that when I was younger I got my eye jabbed by an umbrella and that it really hurt.

That caught her attention. Finally, I thought I was getting somewhere with her.

Until her mouth opened.

L-Is that how you got those stripes?

M-Stripes?

L-Yes, those stripes on your eyes.

M-What stripes? Point to them for me.

And then she pointed to the wrinkles all around my eyes.

I almost told her that those "stripes" are one of the many reasons she should give up on being tan sooner than I did back in the day of the tanning bed. But instead I just increased the length of her time out and went to put on some extra anti-aging eye cream.

Kids. They keep you humble.

If you want to read more stories of how kids' talk has got their parents laughing, head over to Tiny Talk Tuesday.

Tiny Talk Tuesday

Wow, I never thought I'd appreciate my computer moving at the pace of a turtle versus, let's say, a snail...there is just a small difference in their rate of speed...something I am trying to value at the moment.

Thought I'd try to get a quick Tiny Talk Tuesday post up in between computer moans.

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Lily (4 yrs old)-Why do space creatures have to wear a helmet?

(Mom gives a thoughtful yet vastly unappreciated explanation of various atmospheric gases.)

Lily- Oh. I think they wear helmets so when they bump their heads on the moon it doesn't hurt.

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Makes sense to me. Perfect sense.

My "hoffee" girl and her sister who can't breathe

At 19 months, Jade's speech has really been blossoming. I love this stage and seeing how they choose to put their words together to communicate something.

She has recently learned "now", and just by using that little 3 letter word she has suddenly become demanding. "Wa-wa, now! Eat, now!" "Shoes, now!"...good thing she's cute as she makes all these demands.

But my favorite new combination is "hoffee"...I've probably been warning her about coffee being "hot" since birth...why bother saying "hot coffee"? "Hoffee" sums it up pretty well for me.

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The other morning I had to put Lily in time out for pushing Jade. There is a stiff chair in the dining room that I usually make her sit in for four minutes (one minute per year of age) while she thinks about what she has done and forms her apology.

She was so irritated at me for putting her there and although she doesn't often try to get up from the chair, she was objecting quite loudly with her voice. So I closed the glass door between the kitchen and dining room to buffer the noise. As I did, she erupted into even louder wailing.

When I opened the door to inquire what the issue was, she responded, "Don't close the door, Mommy, it makes it too hard for me to breathe!"

Punishment by perceived suffocation. Wow, now that is one I hadn't thought of.

Visit Tiny Talk Tuesday at Not Before 7 to see what other kiddos are saying.

Tiny Talk Tuesday ***Updated w/Video***

***See update below***

Lily's mouth never stops, so I should have more than this to post, but here are just two little tidbits that stayed with me this week.

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While watching Obama being interviewed on TV:

M-Lily, that guy is our new President. Soon he will be the most powerful guy in the whole country.

L-Is he God?

M-No, although some people probably think he is. Thankfully, God is even more powerful than him.

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While Lily was watching me swat at an elusive housefly.

L-Mom, it's like you're trying to give that fly a spanking.

M-Really? Have I missed your behind this many times?

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Have the tiny talkers in your house said anything memorable lately? Join in the fun over at Not Before 7!

***Updated to add video***
Lily has recently become aware of her pictures and video clips being on the computer. Now whenever she sees the Flip video camera, she wants to perform. I forgot to upload this earlier.

My girl can spell. Or sing, at least.